and i wait
and i wait
and i wait
on someone else to bring me happiness
oh dear heart
when will you take it for yourself
and i wait
and i wait
and i wait
on someone else to bring me happiness
oh dear heart
when will you take it for yourself
you can be strong
you can love again
you don’t have to believe
because you are
first it was your hands
that betwixt me
i often thought and craved
daydreamed and hummed
about how they felt
those warm fingers caressing
those firm palms tantalizing
your hands were my salvation
your hands were my undoing
your hands were everything that is good and holy
i fell in love with your hands first
then i fell in love with you
imagine cutting me in half
head to toe
just a clean line straight
from the middle of my forehead
to my inner intersection
i would fall
one side here
the other side there
— that’s how i feel when you leave
i’ve sat stalled at these tracks
knowing that all I have to do
is put pen to paper
fingers to keys
and the words will just flow out
they’ll cascade around me
rushing and swarming
spilling and spitting
yarning the tale of these past few weeks
of promise
of hope
of deceit
of lies
but most of all of renewal
this is my month to clean
scrape the cobwebs from my mind
fast the sugars from my limbs
absorb the sunshine on my brow
finally sit down in this chair
and write
in the quiet moments when your resolve falters
remember all the times you prevailed over hesitation
take heart in the strength it took you to begin this journey
rest for a little in self-gratitude before continuing on