imagine cutting me in half
head to toe
just a clean line straight
from the middle of my forehead
to my inner intersection
i would fall
one side here
the other side there
— that’s how i feel when you leave
imagine cutting me in half
head to toe
just a clean line straight
from the middle of my forehead
to my inner intersection
i would fall
one side here
the other side there
— that’s how i feel when you leave
i’ve sat stalled at these tracks
knowing that all I have to do
is put pen to paper
fingers to keys
and the words will just flow out
they’ll cascade around me
rushing and swarming
spilling and spitting
yarning the tale of these past few weeks
of promise
of hope
of deceit
of lies
but most of all of renewal
this is my month to clean
scrape the cobwebs from my mind
fast the sugars from my limbs
absorb the sunshine on my brow
finally sit down in this chair
and write
in the quiet moments when your resolve falters
remember all the times you prevailed over hesitation
take heart in the strength it took you to begin this journey
rest for a little in self-gratitude before continuing on
cleaved in half by your words and my actions
half of me is a melting puddle
while the other half of me plants seeds
will i water my potential
or will i drown out my possibilities
has all this self discovery
really just been an awareness of others
i see in your eyes
the vulnerability i felt
the worry i push away
the insecurity i fight
please let me help you
i see too much, yes
but i help enough, no
you told me i was heaven
and then you left
do you not want heaven
or do you just not want me

i amplified myself
but the louder i got
the less you heard
i blew myself out

my emotions drip around you
hug down your sides
ripple off your curves
they fully envelope you
i like to think of it
as a warm blanket
wrapped around you
snuggly love
please dont think
that it is suffocating
or overwhelming
and that you cant get away
because as easy as i drip
and as easy as i hold
i can disappear
and i can vanish
vaporized and redrawn
back within me

who are we to thwart the universe
she had a grand design before we took a breath
our momentary worries are fleeting
but our higher purpose is eternal
dont get caught up in what is happening today
trust that putting one foot in front of the other
is all we can do as our destiny unfolds
welcome to my journey
i hope that it brings you solace
as you embark upon your own